Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
