i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
