My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
