508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
