He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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