omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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