She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
