Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
it's like heaven, but drunker
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
