I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize