Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
