All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
