I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
