Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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