And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
We left the knife in your bed.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
