I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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