I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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