I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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