I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Randomize
