THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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