But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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