Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
