nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
