Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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