Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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