my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
