I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize
