You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Mom said you looked used
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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