Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
organizing the empties. That sober.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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