im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I think a kid would responsible me up
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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