So drunk its hurt
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize
