I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize