belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
this is an emotional support booty call
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
