I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
