I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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