The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
