It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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