I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
