winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
