so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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