i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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