im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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