She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
