farters have to be the big spoon...
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
