How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
