Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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