your room smells of hookers.
And success
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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