Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I have aggressive nipples.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
