Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
