I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
