is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
