I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize