super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
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