Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize